Chapter 0: Premonition

I don’t think there are multiple ways to live your life. Certain aspects of life are up to chance, but when given the exact same circumstances, a person would take the same action every time. Time travel is not one of the circumstances. If you knew what you knew in the future, of course your decision would be influenced. We always have thoughts about what we could have done differently, but we didn’t have those thoughts at that point. We will have the exact same thoughts if a scenario is replayed over and over again. (In Fire Emblem, if you take the same moves every time, even though events are up to chance, they will always happen the same way.) I am not insinuating that we don’t have free will. We are all free to make our own decisions; I do not believe in predestination. The power we do not have is premonition. Premonition always suspiciously happens after you make a choice—after the damage has been done.

I can think back to a thousand different things that could have, should have, would have gone smoother, better, wonderfully, perfect if I had said this or done that. Too bad. I can’t change it now that it’s happened. And you could take that positively or negatively. You could cry in a corner, thinking that there’s always a better way to do things, and never try again for fear of failure. OR you could go out and explore, knowing that there’s always a better way to do things, and always try to make yourself better.

When you erase what you’ve written, you’ve learned something.

            Regretting the past is no way to get into the future. It’s never a good idea to forget your mistakes, because then you’d make the same choices over and over again. There is a difference between learning and whining. I complain about things with the best of them, but I’ve got to tell myself that tomorrow is always there. If you think about how things sucked or how they suck right now, there’s no way you’ll end the suck later on. The inverse is also true. If you think about how it’s all going to be better later, you don’t realize what good you have right in front of you. I could quote a certain reptilian kung fu master here, but I’m sure you get the point by now.

I have happy memories. I have sad memories. I have moments I’d like to relive over and over again. I have regrets. I know that it would all happen again, if it did happen again. If you had the ability to know the outcome of all of your important decisions, you would never do anything again. Everything is going to have downsides, and everything is going to have upsides. What I did is who I am. What I do is who I am. I am Ian, and I am going to be myself.

"We all live together and come to embrace the splendid variety of life on earth. Good and bad, sweet and sour—take it for what it is: the glory of life. And this, this cannot be wrong."

Life, Love, Freedom
Ian